Ants In Me Pants

And Other Musings

1. May brings many things: daffodils, the assurance of no more snow in this near-Northerly nook of the province, my 40th birthday, lilacs in bloom late in the month, and worst of all - ants. Brazen black home invaders who arrive like a parade of Debbie Downers with the pleasant weather. Ants fall from the cupboard doors when I open them. Ants crawl on the stovetop while I'm cooking, narrowly avoiding the glowing coils. Ants make pheromone trails for one another to follow on future food- and fact-finding missions and when they are distressed and squished (not saying I routinely kill them, but it happens) they send audible signals to their brethren. The brethren in turn, appear to send out more soldiers, who I swear are more aggressive than their predecessors. Ants are smart, and it's difficult not to hate them when they're all up in your business.

   

   Yay, it’s finally spring! Here come the ants…

2. When kids say, “Look Mommy!” or “Watch this, Daddy!” over and over it is because they desperately want us to see not what they're doing, but rather, who they truly are.

3. Selling my old stuff to fund the purchase of new things is practical, noble, satisfying, and really bloody tiring! Most of the folks I interact with online whilst buying and selling furniture, clothes, household ephemera and music gear are articulate and considerate people. The ones who send rude messages prompted by nothing are obvious energy vampires. I'm proud to say that to this day, I've never bought anything from - or sold anything to - a vampire.

   

   “Is this couch still available?”